Expectation and Disappointment - Karyo Hliso
Yusuf Begtas:

Expectation and Disappointment

Malfono Yusuf Beğtaş
Expectation and Disappointment

In semantic terms, "expectation" is a broadly defined concept that affects the course of life. Its meaning varies from person to person, perception to perception, situation to situation, position to position, office to office, and status to status. In everyday life, it sometimes has jarring and formative effects. 

Any unempathetic expectation is as poisonous as toxic thoughts. Delusional and self-centered expectations are exhausting for the soul. For this reason, thinkers, philosophers, and writers who examine human beings write unanimously: "The less expectation, the more happiness."

William Shakespeare (1564-1616) wrote, "Expectation is the root of all heartache." And George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950) said, "Our lives are shaped not as much by our experiences as by our expectations." 

According to Dücane Cündioğlu, "Lowering peoples' expectations means saving them trouble because expectations mean trouble." 

And according to Robin Sharma, "A person is as happy as their expectations. The formula: Zero expectations, endless happiness." 

Hence, we can hope, but we must try never to raise our expectations. Especially our expectations of people...

Expectation also has a very important place in the world of faith. For example, it is extremely important to do good only for God, without expecting anything from people... in other words, "casting bread upon the waters."

It is best not to have expectations when it comes to doing good. The important thing here is to not let thy left hand know what thy right hand doeth. This is what is valuable and acceptable in the sight of God. This becomes a source of peace and blessings for the doer of the good deed. 

However, in situations where under the influence of undercurrent impulses, the ego/self anticipates material/spiritual compensation for every favor, our perceived fortress might turn to sand in an instant. This, in turn, causes frustration in the current age of speed and knowledge when traditional approaches are eroding and even breaking apart. Many times, stereotypes or prejudices are the main thing that triggers frustration and stirs up problems. Evaluation systems built around narrow-minded stereotypes are to blame. And the lack of spiritual perception and evaluations based on true knowledge doesn’t help either! When traditional approaches urged by stereotypes are synthesized with spiritual perceptions and with new knowledge, all areas—family, society, politics, work, and leadership—will even out. Congestions and difficulties will be more manageable. When stereotypes (prejudices) negatively affect our fixed opinions and powerful prejudices lead to negative conditioning, the influence of traditional attitudes grows involuntarily. However, as the world of meaning expands, so does one's understanding and attitude. And the power of proximity blindness (or lack of self-awareness) and its negative influence is broken. 

Proximity blindness is a psychological trait. It is when people are quick to point out the flaws of others but are blind to their own faults and those of people close to them. They either can't see them or ignore them. 

Sometimes people are so close to themselves that they are unaware of their own faults and the problems they cause. Consultation is as important here as self-criticism. If one has looked in the mirror of the self, which entails self-criticism and consultation, it would be beneficial to seek advice from a person with common sense and wisdom. 

Ancient wisdom says: "A wise man is he who can reason on his own and tap into the wisdom of others." 

In the journey of life, which continues from knowing to doing and then from doing to being, people must turn inward, look at themselves, illuminate their blind spots, ask the right questions, and while doing so, strive to discover their "inner greatness" and use the right methods. Because despite developments and innovations, awareness, virtue, morality, sincerity, honesty, and consciousness are still gained through the journey of self-knowledge. Without these, avoiding the negative consequences and disappointment of expectations is impossible.

Nevertheless, sometimes the problem lies not in the unknown but in wrong information. The main disadvantages of wrong information are that due to insincere and materialistic approaches, cultural and spiritual needs are not adequately met, the meaning and depth of known concepts are not sufficiently grasped or internalized by the mindset, the conscience is not awakened, and individual efforts are insufficient. This negative situation leads people to inner emptiness, away from the truth, and in search of other pursuits. Therefore, it is vital that truth reaches the heart and soul as well as the brain. Recognizing and realizing this with empathetic approaches will benefit all areas of life. 

Of course, it is not easy to have no expectations. But it is possible to gradually lower one's expectations. It is worth keeping this in mind to avoid disappointment.

Yusuf Beğtaş

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